Mediation can be an effective way to resolve divorce disputes, but it’s important to have skilled legal advice throughout the process. One problem that can arise when you and your spouse proceed without attorneys is that you agree to something without thinking it through or understanding the legal ramifications of your decisions. Now you’re unhappy with the result and aren’t sure what to do. Your next step depends on several factors.
Do You Have a Signed Separation Agreement?
At the conclusion of the mediation, there may be a “memorandum of understanding” or “term sheet” that details what you and your spouse agreed to regarding property division, spousal and child support and child custody and parenting time if applicable. Until this document is signed and acknowledged as required by New York law, it isn’t legally binding on you. Therefore, you can renegotiate. However, there may be reasons why you don’t want to open up negotiations again, or you want to be careful about how you proceed.
If you did sign and acknowledge the separation agreement, generally, a court will enforce it unless you can demonstrate fraud, duress, undue influence or unconscionability.
Have You Reviewed Your Agreement with an Attorney?
Assuming an agreement wasn’t signed, you should hire an attorney to review the terms. Your attorney can explain your rights and obligations and the ramifications of what you agreed to. You can also discuss why you’re unhappy with the terms and get advice on whether to pursue the changes you want.
What Are the Pros and Cons of Renegotiating Your Agreement?
If the agreement is unfair or you gave much more to your spouse than you were required to under the law, it may be worth trying to reopen negotiations and/or litigate the issue. However, you have to weigh this against what you might lose in the process. Arguing over your concerns may cause your spouse to rethink other terms, and you may destroy your entire settlement. If you cannot resolve your conflicts, you may end up in litigation, which is time-consuming and costly, and what you were trying to avoid when you went to mediation.
How Can You Broach the Subject with the Least Risk?
It’s important to be respectful when asking for changes. You and your spouse went through the mediation process, and now you want to reopen discussions, which could anger your spouse. Making threats or demands will only make matters worse.
Your attorney can provide guidance on the best way to share your concerns and reach an amicable settlement to the extent possible.
If you and your spouse want to mediate your divorce or you have already gone through the process, we can help ensure your agreement is fair and equitable. Contact us for a consultation.
