When you get married, you envision it lasting for a lifetime. Unfortunately, things don’t always work out that way, and you may wonder whether you should continue your marriage. If you aren’t sure if you’re ready to divorce, a temporary separation may be a good idea. However, before you decide, consider these key points.
How Do You Feel About Your Spouse and Your Marriage?
You should first seek counseling to work on resolving your marital issues. If that doesn’t improve the situation, but you still love each other, a temporary separation can provide clarity about your next step.
What Is Temporary Separation?
Temporary separation is an agreement whereby spouses decide to live separate and apart for a specified period, often 6 months. The goal is to use that time to decide whether to divorce or continue working on the marriage.
The separation agreement may address the same issues that would be decided in a divorce matter: equitable distribution of property, spousal support, child support, child custody, and parenting time. However, since the agreement is temporary, you may not want to completely separate your finances (i.e., income and expenses). If you keep your finances together, both of you should continue to receive financial statements from the other party, so there are no secrets.
Note that any arrangements regarding parenting time, child support and spousal support are likely to continue if you get divorced because you have established a schedule and expectations. This is why you want to discuss your agreement with an attorney before signing it.
During the separation, you will retain marital benefits, such as the right to financial support, health insurance coverage, and certain military benefits. You’ll also file a joint tax return.
How Long Should You Wait to Decide About Divorce?
Signs that you may be ready for divorce include frequent disagreements that you cannot resolve, domestic violence or verbal abuse, and infidelity. However, it’s best to wait at least 3-4 months before making a decision. Often, couples feel relief or doubts immediately after separation. However, that may be a reaction to the change in circumstances. You’re away from that stress, which may make you happy or sad, but that isn’t necessarily a reflection of how you feel about your spouse. Delaying the decision gives you time to adjust and think through your feelings.
If you are considering divorce or separation, contact our firm to discuss how we can help you achieve a positive outcome.
