In some divorces, one or both spouses worry that the other spouse will do something to hurt them financially or take their children. Sometimes, this is because of specific statements the spouse made. However, in other cases, there are no explicit threats or conduct. The fear is based on feelings about the spouse and his or her general behavior. Being proactive and sending a letter to warn a spouse not to take such action can be helpful, but not in all situations. It depends on the facts.
When a Letter May Be Helpful in Divorce
If a spouse makes statements or threats about serious matters, a letter of advisement to that spouse may be warranted. For example, a spouse threatens to empty bank accounts, block access to credit cards, move or sell property, take/withhold children, change locks or take similar actions.
Typically, an attorney would draft and send a letter advising the spouse not to engage in such conduct. This acts as a warning to discourage the spouse from doing anything knowing that he or she will have to answer for it in court. In these situations, an attorney should send the letter.
What to Do If No Threats Have Been Made
Divorce is an emotional process, which is made worse if it is adversarial. It isn’t unusual for parties to see each other as unreasonable, cruel, dishonest or manipulative during divorce, and therefore, be suspicious or fearful. Where spouses are concerned about what the other will do, but there aren’t any statements or actions to clearly support their beliefs, a letter may not be the best response. It could exacerbate tensions, especially if the letter is sent by a lawyer.
Before doing anything, discuss the situation with an experienced attorney, who can help determine whether a letter is warranted. It’s also important to keep the lines of communication open during the divorce. In some cases, you or your attorney may be able to raise concerns in a less formal manner that doesn’t result in more conflict.
If you are considering divorce, contact our firm to learn how we can help protect your rights and achieve a positive outcome in your divorce.
